Saturday, February 11, 2006

Dear Everest Communications...you suck.

Who knew watching the Olympics would be so much work?

This morning I turn on CNBC to watch women's hockey, and I'm looking at an infomercial. The onscreen guide says hockey. I look at NBC's website, which is useless because their listings are apparently broken. I check other listing sites (TVGuide, Zap2It, Time-Warner Cable (Everest's chief competitor)) and they all say women's hockey should be on.

So, I call my cable company and inquire as to why I'm looking at Jessica Simpson talking about her zits instead of Olympics. I'm told that the guide is incorrect and that no-one (they specifically mention Time-Warner) in the area is showing Olympic coverage at this time. I call bullshit under my breath, thank them, and hang up.

I then call my parents in Omaha, and inquire as to what's on CNBC. Surprise! It's hockey!

I call my cable company back. I tell them what transpired the first call, and tell them the folks in Omaha are watching hockey, and not Victoria Principal and her skin cream. They tell me that the coverage must be blacked-out in this area. Blacked-out? International ice hockey coverage blacked-out in Kansas Fucking City? They insist it's true, and again insist that Time-Warner isn't showing it, either. I tell them my girlfriend has Time-Warner, and that if I call her and she sees hockey on CNBC, my next call to them will be to cancel my service. "Okay". I hang up.

I call my girlfriend and have her turn on CNBC. Surprise! Hockey! While I'm railing to her about this, and how I'm gonna have to go thru the hassle of actually canceling my cable service and signing up with a new one, Jessica Simpson is magically replaced with this mystical, blacked-out, not-on-anywhere-else Russia/Sweden hockey game! What a bargain!

Everest Customer Service: